Sorry, it's been awhile .....

Gods ways are so different to mine. I am reminded of this when I read the word and also challenged. Back a few months I read this and was spurred on with what it said, even though it was flippin hard: Luke 6:27-28. Love your enemies. Do good to those who hate you. Bless those who curse you. Pray for those who abuse you.
It’s hard to bless d. It’s hard to pray for him to be blessed when he hasn’t bestowed anything close to a blessing to me in the last wee while.
I put the car in to get a warrant and found out that it was going to cost $600 without even the main prob fixed. I welled up with emotion and tears infront of the nice mechanic guy. The car needed to be fixed. There was no getting around that. So after praying I felt to ring d. He said, after trying to hold my tears back while explaining, that he’d “think about it”. Helping me that is, he’d think about it. That made things worse and I realised why. I just actually wanted to be rescued and to be told that it was all going to be OK. And I wanted to be told by him because he’s supposed to love and care for me. Turns out the next day he let me know he would let me have that money. Funny thing is – I love a funny side to a story, I went to visit the ceo’s of the church d goes too (as they are close and wonderful friends), and they said their church (the one d goes too) will pay for the rest of the bill. Hillarious and wonderful all at the same time.
So how to pray? I am pleased to admit that I have been able to pray, despite my feelings of confusion over the way he treats me. I have been able to pray that God would bless d and I even offered him some meatballs to take home. I did what I felt God is saying and it is actually good for my soul. He didn’t take the meatballs. Silly boy, they are amazing!
L, our 4 year old, cocked her head back as she walked away from me this weekend (to head to daddy’s) and said, “you’re going to be OK mummy, don’t worry!” She also told me she liked my pink nail polish and could she have some when she got home. When the girls came home today K said, “I’m so glad to be home mummy”. I’m so glad they are home too. I’m planning to have meatballs this week, with my darlings.