Abandonment

I’m loving doing stuff around the house (not gardening or anything helpful like that mind you!). Since I’ve had no real job (apart from mothering and hanging out with people over late's!) I’ve had plenty of time to explore the somewhat creative side I seem to have. It has had opportunity to not come out while I was being mum and working full time. So not with any purposeful agenda at first, I’ve enabled my creative side to come out.
I change rooms around, not sure how many times you can do that really but I seem to do it often. I’ve created some art works that probably wouldn’t sell in a gallery but that have come from an amazing experience I’ve had or just that I like the thought of something and want to see it more than just in my head.
This is such a great thing and I love doing it. I love doing crafty arty-farty things. And I’m so glad I’ve discovered that.
A word to live by this year: Abandonment. I was encouraged by reading a friends blog and by listening to her heart, that a word was a good thing to have – something to work towards, sit in my heart, mess with my head and my plans and even something to aspire too.
Adam and Eve put on fig leaves to cover themselves. To cover their sin. To cover their nakedness. To abandon myself to my Saviour is a true, naked-like-thing to do. What it looks like, I’m not sure but I do imagine a sweet girl running through a field of long grass, wearing a white dress, dancing and laughing without care for who would dare to be looking. Am I OK to come to God as I am? Am I going to respond to Him with the knowledge that He knows all anyway and is just waiting for me, wooing me, loving me and desiring my presence? Sometimes I’m just not sure how to come to big lovely God.
I’m knowing it’s not rocket science (to come to Him) and I’m knowing it is faith. Coming, saying “this is me …. warts and all, I really love you God, you are fabulous and so kind and I’m just going to sing you this wee song that I made up because you make me want to sing sometimes……. I also love it that before I even thought about you, You loved me, little me …… I am in awe of how you talk to me and tell me great and important things. You guide me and lead me constantly……
You make me smile a lot and you ………… well you let me ask you questions of dumb stuff I just don’t get. You seem to answer when you want and that is often in strange ways, but I like that, mostly. You are a good good God. You bless me. I come to you today – with arms wide open … in awe of the one who gave it all …..