Spoilt lady

It was a 37 year olds birthday in our home yesterday.  The 37 year old was woken at 6am to little happy birthday talkings but allowed to sleep for an extra half hour while the 6 year old made her card.  Phew for the older lady.  She was glad.

The card was made and was such a kind card.  It said 27!  Then it had an oops underneath it followed by the correct digits.  Very cute.

The small digited ladies of the house gave the more senior birthday girl this: 

The day continued as friends gathered for Strawberry cloud, shrunk chocolate mud cake and lemon creme (thank you Pip (ala Annabelle Langbein) and Bec for the recipes!).  Many pals met at our new place, for wine, chatting and fun.

All day she seemed to gather a line of presents around her, wherever she went.  She was feeling very thought of and very blessed.  parcels and texts from all over the country, world and from little Palmy Town too. 

Loved it, quite stress free really esp at Chrissy time.  So glad some lovely peeps could come out amongst the busy season to celebrate another year gained in the life of one person.


There were no parks in the couldersack where we live, i think the street got a fright as it's such a quiet wee street and then i go and throw a PARTY!

I will try  my best to tell people to celebrate their own age-turning.  But i kept wanting to pull out of this one, it felt like it was 'crazy-loco' with Chrissy approaching (no diff from any year i'm guessing!).  BUT so so glad i did it.  I was esp glad as I got to share  a wee bit with one of my beautiful guests, about how much God loves her.  What an honour, on an older ladies birthday!

37 - nearer to 40 than i've ever been.  Loving life and still not feeling old.  Just prob seeing it in my body! This week my mum was up and i had begun to feel slightly overwhelmed with being on my own and trying to do all the things that one needs to do with working and keeping house and caring for babes.  She encouraged me, bought us bk for dinner and i know she will be praying for me without her even saying.  My mum doesn't read this (as i've always kind of kept this as my personal diary), but I do wanna put it out there that she is very much the mum of the YEARS of my life.  Amazing woman.


The birthday continues - we're making our way down the island to the airport for tomorrow, visiting with some LIFE friends along the way.  What a special honour it is to do life with people.  New and old friends.  Appreciating that, all the 37 years of it.


Merry CHRISTmas.  May the wonder of God sending his son to earth, be fresh for you this year.  May you know Him more. Love me xx

stars in my eyes

Some things are truly physical reminders, like stars, that God is near.  Emmanuel.

This little girl and her sis make me smile (and sometimes scream) a lot.

Both L and K have sewn their names onto pillowcases, so lovely.

A bit scratchy to sleep on i imagine so we turn them over!

Sometimes I feel particularly useless at connecting with God, apart from rambling my desperations or mutterings to him when I"M needing some kind of help.

Ever present God.  Never leaving or forsaking God.  Loving Father.

I read this which encouraged me today:

"When you find yourself empty, do not imagine a mountain of transfiguration will be the answer.  Sit. breathe quietly for a few min in your own room, on your own chair.  Trust.  Sometimes when you do this regularly, you are brought into a quiet place of prayer where you are not sure where you end and where God begins."

Moving on with  a few more stars in my eyes .......

All of these women were seen by me in the last few weeks, one friend from Ausi was flying in for a family thing and the other was flying in from Christchurch for Bon Jovi and through a few texts we managed to sort out a brunch date.  Old friends from yonks ago. Dear dear friends.

We then hit this dear one's special birthday!  So bliss to celebrate with you Pip, love you precious and twinkling star.

Ange, being with you, even for a few hours, is fun and needed.

You are true.  You are loving.  You are inspiring.

Thank you for your heart towards me.  A star in my eyes

(So glad that Bon Jovi helped us meet up!  Thank you BJ).

We head away next week over the seas and far away.  Holidays are great and so too is Christmas.

I'm hopeful to get better at a few things next year - being better at getting out of the house without causing fireworks,

jumping on the tramp with the girls even more, 

(i nearly die of exhaustion as i'm double bouncing the girls all over the place)

being more prayerful, however that looks,

bike riding with my babes,

realising that God speaks even through annoyances with others

(perhaps asking Him, "what is going on here for me?  Why am I reacting this way?) - sounds very deep

blah blah

Merry Christmas.  

(Posts have been very sparse of late.  Sorry if it's frustrating jumping on and seeing the same post!)

making lemon drink

The girls and I had our dear friends over tonight for pizza.

We have never had them here for dinner, they always have us.

It was so nice having them, having a house big enough to host their number 5 family.

The girls are lovely friends with Anya.  They always have fun when they are together.  

Tonight was no different.  


Lemons were picked, bitten in half and poured into a container.


Sugar was added (thankfully) and the taste was bliss (surprisingly).  One lucky adult got an ant included in their drink.

Karen and Hugh, Anya and Micki are leaving for England very soon.  Anjali is staying in NZ for another year.  We will miss you, pizza night at your place, laughs, the enduring encouragement of being friends with you.  I have not met anyone like you before and I have been changed and blessed by your companionship.  I am glad that saying goodbye is not forever, and I'm glad it's highly likely we will visit you in the near future, for pizza and chats.


Love you dear friends, love drinking tarty lemon drinks with you.
(thank you Anjali for the photos)

Thanksgiving day and the next

I do these crazy things.  I think up wee party ideas and invite people and then think, "oh what on earth will i do to theme it?" or "what food will we eat"?  All these thoughts are happening usually on the day or during the during the lead up to the party but this week has been hectic, so the thoughts came in the two hours before the party started!  It's amazing what you can do with a few moments.


But before the party info, i want to write about the thing I'm most thankful for and most humbled by, this week.  Kathy this is for you my beautiful friend.


After our final Religious Education session this morning, my partner in crime (Kathy Kathy) and I sat down to eat from the Lindt chocy box we'd been given and to read the long notes we'd been gifted.  Some of the comments are as follows, some of these bought tears to my eyes ......  It's all worth it.  The gospel (the good news of God) is so worth sharing.


 ...'The best thing about you guys teaching us in RE is ..... uh hm EVERYTHING!  You turn stories from the bible into fun and exciting things.  Since you read the story of Moses you inspired me to get a bible and read it for myself and I love it. I read it every night' .


...'I learned that God is with you wherever you are'


...'I've learned lots of things about the Lord and the stories and if you trust God he'll help you through bad times'


...'Thank you for being the X factor RE teachers of our room.  


....'It was really easy getting up on a Friday morning.  I learnt to trust God even when things are bad.'


....'I have learnt a lot of prayers from the Bible at RE.  My favourite one is the Lords prayer. It really got stuck in my head after that fun X-factor game you organised for us'....


....'I have learnt about god and Jesus more.  Thanks to Kathy i have started to go to church.  And Sarah, you make me laugh with your funny props'.


...'What I liked is that you taught us about God and I loved it.  I liked it when you were teaching me about God.  Now i can pray'. 


...'I really liked learning about the story of Moses because it taught us that everyone can be amazing and you don't have to do everything perfectly'.


I am humbled by the fact that little old us could share about God and that we get to see the fruit of that - kids lives being changed by the amazing truth of God - He cares, he answers prayers, He is with us. Some of the kids that wrote these letters, come from pain and heartache.  
Thanks Kathy for the fun ride we have together every Friday.  Thank you for being yourself and sharing the amazing gift you have, with us.  I learn heaps from you, I love working with you.  I love being your friend.


Thanksgiving evening was simple and fun - a few friends, we ate yummy things and read each others thanksgiving notes.  Loved it.  Hoping for some pumpkin pie next year maybe. Apparantly it tastes yummy.

Taking a moment to be thankful, with friends.

This week-ish

Just got a bike. so excited.  It looks like an old fashioned one with big lollipy handle bars (just needs a basket) but it's gold and modern in other ways. very cool for biking with my babes.  They used to bike to the corner and wait for me to get there on my feet.  only thing i'm worried about is the need to wear one of those ugly helmets.

Praying, hoping and looking for work for next year.  Love to be more independent that way but it needs to be a stable job for me. Relieving at the last minute hasn't been lots of fun for my control-freak nature.

Looking forward to heading to the Gold Coast for Chrissy.  We are loving the thought of going to spend Christmas with our family.  Big bro and wifey have kindly paid big bucks for us to head over there.  What a gift!

I've got some more preaching lined up for next year.  It's been such an honour being asked to join a team of people (all men) to plan our stuff for next year.  I feel slightly 'stupid' around them but they obviously appreciate my input.  I'm quite excited about being asked which 'slot' i'd like to take throughout the year.

Need to do exercise.  hoping the bike-riding will help.

Gotta wee trip with my girli friends coming up too - a trip to the Capital for a night, staying in a hotel and hanging with my beautiful friends, straight after the gold coast trip. oh me oh my.  What a delight to stay with Waikanae girls, Singapore girl and Palmy girl (myself).  Together again, bliss.

Planning a wee birthday shin dig, mine is close to chrissy and it feels annoying to plan something but I always encourage others too so I MUST TOO!!

I'm reading a few 'dad' books at the mo.  My feelings of abandonment have been showing up recently and so i'm wanting to face it.  I've ordered a few new release books on 'fatherless generations' and am hoping to be encouraged and challenge myself as well as how i can help my own kids and others.  Letting my pain turn to something great is the big picture here for me.

I've gone to the same cafe now for three years, just about every day.  That's a lot of coffee money and a lot of time.  The relational side of me saw more than just getting good coffee.  It saw a great opportunity to input into others lives, even by just being friendly.  One of the fellas (barista) text me the other day asking if I could come and visit himself and his wife as they wanted to go to church.  I was humbled as i visited their home, heard their story and their need for God.  They want to hang some more (i've mostly only seen them at the cafe during work hours) and talk about God, they have expressed genuine interest for us to be involved in their lives.  Little old us with Big old God.  This was a magical experience.  A thrilling one.

My darling Hannah friend made us a garden with corn, tomatoes, more lettuce, capsicum, corgette and more.  It's so cute and lovely looking.  But you'll note that my first lot of lettuces are carefully placed on the BBQ due to the frequent visitor on our property.  The bunny.  The bunny is cute but if it eats my new plot of pleasure, I've told the girls I'm gonna have to shoot Mr B.  Never shot one before but desperate times may call for the gun (or the spade!).  We all laugh when i talk about it, even when i tell the bunny.  I'm not sure what i'll do if it truly does bust a move on the g-den.

Last thing:  I sent a text out on Sunday inviting some precious poppets round to my 'thanksgiving' du.  It's a 'finger-food' event (due to the short notice i've given) this Thurs, with only one task:  'please bring a note with something (or multiples) that you're thankful for.'  Could be on scrappy paper, just the content is what is important.  We'll share the notes round and read them out at some stage during the evening.  Hoping it's gonna be a fun time. 

Hope you're doing celebrating this month and next as you head towards Christmas again, remembering the season reason.  


Oh yeah - my K babe has been doing really well, she seems much happier.  We've been praying each night re the angry thoughts in her head and although she doesn't say much, she doesn't complain. She is bouncy, friendly, polite (all of these most of the times) and I'm proud of her.  I've been speaking words of confidence into her wee mind - We're not going anywhere, your feelings are really important, we don't run away from stuff, God heal our hurt where it's still lurking ....... ah the journey.

hello, it's me again. long time i know .....

Amidst shifting house, a lot has happened.

Like for example the time when i was in a cafe (last week) and the whole street went quiet as some diplomat cars pulled up, body guards and important people got out.  I live in small-ish Palmy, NZ and it's not often we see the famous.  Anyway when the famous got out of the car, to come to the same cafe i attend, i didn't recognise him.  Yes, I did ask someone and they didn't know.  And Yes i did the thing i wished i hadn't - i asked the body guard.  In disdain he answered: He's the governor General of NZ.
Of course he is.  Good times.

Birthday parties.  We love those.  And we are always glad when they are over.

Tantrums in the couldersack.  I thought i was moving into this place to hopefully be a blessing to those around this area, who were in need.  But on Monday morning, just before school, as I chased my daughter down the couldersack (as she was running from home with her toys, two fav books and pocket money jar), whilst having a diabetic hypo, I realised i was the one in desperate need of help.  Funny now. Not funny AT ALL on that day.  Tears from all three of us, despair and worry.  I spent the day in shock as i felt like the whole neighbourhood had witness the explosion from our place.

This same wee lady has confessed today to me, whilst bike riding to our local fish'n'chip shop, she has had angry thoughts whizzing around her head lately.  So glad to hear that coming out of her mouth.  Now we can do something with that.  Not sure what, but God knows.


Little lady - she has had some beautiful thoughts lately as she's contemplated life again, without daddy.  She can hardly believe the truth of the fact he is not coming home.  But she did think he could pop home for a week and help me get pregnant and then leave again, as she'd quite like a baby around the place.  Nice thing that we've had random bunny rabbits turn up at our house frequently these last few weeks.  Hoping they will suffice the baby-craving!

This little lady said she had asked God for a husband for me (I am smiling about her kind thoughts) and she told me tonight that after she prayed in bed, God answered and said Yes He would provide a husband for the mother ("how did God say that to you?"  "Oh he just did mum!").

It's been ages since i've written and i've known i've wanted too for quite sometime.   Christmas is looming and i have bought no presents really. slacker, crazy, ridiculous. I feel this silly pressure coming on me, like there's just far too much stuff on and i'd rather lie down under a wee tree sipping some nice refreshment.  But that is life.

It has been a full-on few weeks but i'm so glad we moved now and not just before Christmas!  This new place is peaceful and very pleasant.  I've already had two good loads of firewood dropped off for us! I've had moments where i've felt exhausted and moments that i've laughed and loved.  I feel this place represents something new for us but i'm glad to take some of the tradition, ideas, funstuff with us to help us journey on.  If you're thinking of us, please pray esp for K.  I am hoping for breakthrough with her so she doesn't have to carry  sadness around in the form of anger.  Praying that I'll be able to be wise and helpful too, whilst not losing my mind!  No more fireworks from her or anyone would be much appreciated! ta, always xx

The 'together' partaeeeee ........

I had suspenders to hold my torsellette (sp?) down under my dress so i didn't look pregnant, the pantihose I wore was constantly rolling down my thighs causing sausage like pictures under my skirt, and despite the last two statements, it was the funnest night out in a long time!

12 gals, frocks on (bride-ish, bridesmaidish), frills and puff included, vintage and modern, drinks and nibbles to start, photos in the square of the city we live in and dinner out at a packed-out popular joint (not mcd's that's for sure!). 

Some wore their own, some wore others, some wore 6th form ball dresses and everyone looked gorgeous.  There were giggles, hillarity, late-brides (of course), lipstick marks on glasses and even a garter!  Shoes were swapped in true girl fashion, everyone spoke of how lucious the others looked. 

It was fun.  It was new.  People thought it was silly.  It shall be talked about for a long time. 

perfect timing

I have kept thinking about how i didn't want the effort of having to look for a new house for us to live in and that my procrastination in the matter wasn't going to help any.
But yet again, God has reminded me of his good plans (despite my lack of help) and his fabulous timing.
Ending this particular season of my life (although carrying major parts of it into the next, eg my beautiful children), i had felt that an adventure was on its way.  I was up for something new. Part of starting this next episode in the book of our lives has ended up being us shifting house.  And that is an adventure for sure. 
I didn't try very hard to find a place, it seemed too scary looking.  So i put off looking at the one house i thought was quite cool.  Turns out it was in the same street where I know some lovely folk and after casting the idea aside, i spoke with these people - "I was thinking of being your neighbour, joke joke!"  Turns out the house was owned by their relative and they put the good word in, hoped and wa-laaaaah, we got it.  Simplicity indeed.

So back where we live now, life is changing but there's still time for scooter riding and home-made pizza with friends.


Boxes have started to appear everywhere.

The girls are whizzing with excitement, even L packed more boxes than myself on Saturday.

Some bits of our new pad:

Amongst moving boxes of guff around to the new abode, there are definately parties to be had!

I've always wanted to have a party where girls get together wearing their old brides dresses (borrowed or their own) or bridesmaids dresses (borrowed or their own), some canapes at someones home to get our confidence pumping and then out to hit the town with our frocks!  So this Saturday it's my 'together' party.  It's funny as it's fallen around the same time as my d-vorce coming through but it really has nothing to do with that.  It's about having an excuse to have some fun and to wear something that most women only get to wear once.

The invite says:
'they say two are better than one.  Thank you for making my one better.
Let's frock up and have some fun..........  


This party is a small part of the adventure too.  There are all sorts of different friends from around the town we live in, coming.  And the adventure here, is doing life with them.  I love it how God is everywhere, in the fun too.  


Party, whether the timing is right or not.  Why not?

good but crazy week

Hello week, good to see you finally ending although you've been certainly quite good on some days!
Well done week.
It was feeling like you were not a nice week after the alarm clock in the girls room, randomly went off late into the night and I, being alert and on the ball, stumbled my way round the room, to turn it off.
Nice one.
Then on the next few nights, the phone left on, in the same girls room, running low on battery and beeping itself to all who could hear, in the middle of the night (of course) AAAAAANNNNDD the cats screeching the next night topped it off.  So i thought!
What about this Mr week,  not sure what you were thinking:  The bookcase falling on K and myself as we lay snuggling on her bed.  That was a cracker, not literally thankfully.  The week was ending well as I could feel all sorts of pain all over my body from the 'bookcase' incident.  I am grateful not to you Mr week, but to God, that K wasn't hurt.  
I've had such a pleasant time Mr W, on the other ocassions that were available for niceness:  lovely texts from pals, a new house to live in, a days teaching, wee presents here and there and my body feeling much better from the books and their case doing their falling thing.  
The new house to move into feels good.  It is an answer to the prayers of all the three people living in this abode at present:  fireplace (not open!), heat pump, bath, big lounge, driveway, grounds with trees.
No looking, just divine appointment.  Even neighbours who i know.  Nice ending mr Week indeed.  We will move on K's birthday.  Happy birthday to my babe.
Thankfully Mr Week, the fish didn't die at all.  They are still breathing and their keeper is doing a faithful 6-year old job of caring for them. 
It has been a crazy busy week, but good.  The teaching i did reminded me or showed me, that i'm not so good at that anymore and that i need to brush up on my skills.  That's OK.  Should have guessed it and not been in so much shock.  
It was a week that was too rushed, we did too much and that made me feel crazy.  I'm aiming that next week will not have so many things in it, but quality with the things we do do.  I guess that will involve packing.  yippiee.  
Hope you've had a good week.  To finish this week i'm going to the movies with some lovely friends. 
Good, not crazy.

Love letters

Dear K and L

I am so glad you are home.

I loved it how you bought me a candle K, you commented on how I always bring you presents when I go away and you wanted to do the same.  So sweet.

I love it how you told me you really missed me L, how you are happy to be home. I felt so loved when you asked how my time has been without you.  What a thoughtful girl you are.  You can see, I hope, that even when you’re away, I can choose to spend my time with friends and make the most of the opportunities.

I am sorry that your heart feels like it’s crashed sometimes, as you are living out the journey you’ve kind of been stuck in.  Tears streamed down your face this Sun am before church, as you again asked hopeful questions about your dad joining us. I do pray for your tender heart and I did remind you that God heals our hearts when they feel sore and hurt.  I showed you what a hand lifted to God with our little piles of sadness in it, looked like.  I told you that he loves to take our pain and to pour his love into us.

K I loved how you yelled out “I’m so glad I’m home” after you’d settled back in.  When we went for a bike ride, I felt so glad you shared your feelings with me.  I was talking of a moment when dad was younger but I called him ‘your dad’.  You told me gently that it made you feel like he wasn’t part of us.  I responded saying I was sorry to make you feel that way and also that sometimes it’s hard to know what to call him, after he left mummy.  Good conversations. 

I can’t tell you this now, as you’re too young to understand it really, but d and I are now divorced.  I got the certificate (yes it was like a ‘well-done’ award on nice paper) this week while you were away.  It’s not something that we’ll be putting on the wall, but it is there, quietly sitting in it’s own little place.

So while lots of things will stay the same, I’m ready for whatever God has for us in this new time.  We are such a great team, I am so grateful to God that you are in my life.  I would not be the same without you two!  I feel like my heart has got a lot better and I’m kind of up for some kind of new adventure.  But also I want to be a careful mumma who watches out for you when you need reassuring or extra care, and that I’ll be aware of myself when I run into my pain sometimes and have to ask for help or prayers or just a moment to breathe.

I’m thankful for the fish we got for you L (and as of today they are still alive), I’m grateful for the times we’ve had over the holidays together and I’m jolly grateful for u, 2. May I always be a mum who leads you to God for your strength and help.  He is so amazing and I honour Him for who we are today.

Love mum

Going fishin

Hello Blog page
I haven't talked to you for awhile, sorry about that.
Things have been fine, mostly, like normal!
There have been great things - like home made lemon merange (how do you spell that?) cheesecake,


sloshing around in the rain-soaked ground whilst falling in love again with the smell of spring and all the cherry blossums it brings,

winning prizes whilst sitting about one metre away from the first Master -Chef winner from New Zealand,


seeing wonderful friends,


being reminded to 'let things go' by caring friends who tell their own kids that (and as I listen I get encouraged and challenged),

(thanks Shell, love u)


and of course, there are rough things that make my heart break again - like saying bye to my girls for a week on the same weekend that the divorce mr x bought about, came through.  oh my giddy aunt it rains and pours sometimes, esp when you live in Palmy North.

Liv has wanted a fish for a very long time, i think one would have been fine but after doing serious research it turns out you need more than one for it's survival.
And then it turns out you need a rectangle tank, not a round one, as fish need a 'river-like' situation to do their living in, in your home.
But wait, there's more ...... water conditioner, cleaning the tank out vigorously after you've already done that (because you used detergent - ah der Sarah, what were you thinking?), filtered water for fish survival, oxygen weed and probably a fish wardrobe and several outfits for it to choose from!
I thought maybe it would be like the fish from Dr Seuss's 'the cat and the hat', it just kind of sat there, speaking sometimes, with it's round bowl.
BUT no, to do the right thing, sometimes takes a lot of effort.  Even having a pump to airate the water, on for several days before the arrival of the fish, is of vital importance.  And then they could die.  Even on the first day.
But we are getting the fish, when the girls get home at the end of the week.  Water pumped, tank cleaned (for the seventh time), food ready, my mind prepared for a great experience perhaps with a few dead fish on the way. Ah such is life.


It turns out i can survive without my girls being here, and  i can enjoy the break but it has been a emotional ride.  The fish part has mostly made me laugh and think 'heck, what am i getting myself into?' But the part where the kids have to leave with someone who doesn't care for me anymore, and that that has to be a 'normal' part of my life from here in, is hard.


I'm thinking about how it will be great when this is not my complete story anymore.  I've had such great tales to share from these past few years amidst all the schmuck, but i'm feeling really ready for a new story with some different adventures, with these two poppets and maybe a fish or two.

Cool thing: at the MasterChef evening, i won the best prize (i reckon):  Al Browns (from Logan Brown, Wellington) Go FISH, book.  Such a great theme this week!